Matthew Dellavedova's Championship Tour Continues To Be A Wild Ride

Matthew Dellavedova, you just won the NBA Finals, what are you gonna do next?!

I’m going to a theme park in Sandusky, Ohio!!!!

Somehow, someway Delly’s championship tour is 1000x more entertaining than JR Smith’s right now. If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewed to the floor I couldn’t be more surprised, but it’s true. Delly’s dedication to the simple things is downright uproarious. Vegas club? “One Corona. Canned, please.” After that? It’s not time to go party your face off for a week, time to go ride the Millennium Force, seemingly alone, and do the double thumbs up. Then pose in front of the Cedar Point sign, again alone, again with the thumbs up. Delly is a 25 year old single man but he’s the daddest dad that’s ever lived. He dresses like him, he acts like him, he poses for pictures like him. Delly’s a dad.

You ever go on vacation with your family and your dad really wants to do something but you and all your siblings roll your eyes and drag ass until he just decides fuck it, he’s gonna go himself? “Alright daddddd. I’m coming. I’ll go get ready now. Give me a bit.” “No, you know what? I’ll just go alone. Thought we’d do one thing together on this goddamned trip but forget it. I’ll go on this hiking trip by myself!” That’s Delly with his team. Just had one thing he wanted to do. Just thought maybe if he went to the club and did what they wanted, a few guys would tag along to the Millennium Force, but instead they’re all acting immature. They’re all going out and getting drunk while poor Delly’s gotta ask strangers to take thumbs up pictures of him by himself. Poor guy.

PS – Reminds me of one of my all-time favorite internet pictures: Big Z crammed into the Rowdy Rooster at Canobie Lake after losing to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup Final. A picture is worth a 1,000 words and, in this one, they’re all “depression.”